Racists Refuse to Let Holder “Be Clear”

Attorney General Eric Holder is in the hot seat today and he seems to be melting. I’ve been watching it for hours so you don’t have to and I’ve condensed his answers into two sentences that will give you the gist of his testimony. And remember, he’s under oath.

“Let me be very very very very very very very very very clear. I don’t know.” Followed by a little, “That was a Bush appointee”.

I just summed up like six hours of testimony for you. You’re welcome.

Mostly what we’ve learned today is that Holder does nothing and knows nothing so he can be held responsible for nothing. But we should continue to pay him to do nothing and know nothing because racism. Also, it’s Bush’s fault.

Though it was mostly Holder’s voice on repeat saying, “I don’t know…let me be clear…I don’t know,” there were a few highlights in the testimony. Darrell Issa, having apparently tired of the constant obfuscation, pressed Holder to actually answer a question at which point the Attorney General of the United States collapsed into a full on temper tantrum, saying Issa’s “conduct” as “a member of congress” was “unacceptable and shameful”.

Representative Hank Johnson, when not wringing his hands over the possibility of Guam tipping over, expressed his frustration with the talk of Fast and Furious and Benghazi and wished everyone would focus on “real issues”. Because top government officials being directly responsible for the deaths of Americans isn’t nearly as real as that retarded squirrel Johnson is allowing to grow on his chin.

The greatest question so far came from Congressman Trent Franks. He took on the Left’s love of baby butchery by saying, “[Abortion is a] heartless disgrace that cannot be described by the vocabulary of man”. He then went on to ask Holder, “Have you ever enforced the Born Alive Infant Protection Act even one time? After 18,000 opportunities?” In news that shocks no one, Holder stuttered and stumbled and could not answer the question. In stunning proof of the Left’s anti-life ideology, Holder did manage to sneak in a jab at President Bush, but could not defend his refusal to prosecute any of the 18,000 violations of the Born Alive Infant Protection Act.

Holder is still being questioned even as I type, so while we can call this story “developing”, it’s fairly safe to assume it won’t develop much beyond, “I don’t know”, “Bush’s fault”, and “racism”.